Q&A: Room Sharing

Q: “How long do you suggest a baby sleep in mum and dad's room. My baby is four month old and I really feel I need my own space at night. I'd always planned on keeping my baby in our room until he was at least six months but feel I can't wait that long. I guess I am after reassurance I am doing the right thing by moving bub into his own room at only four months old.” - New mum, tired but happy

A: Nearly everyday in my clinic a new parent will ask me this exact question. My answer is that every parent is different. There certainly is no right or wrong answer to this question. Some parents have their baby in their room for one night, one week, 6 weeks, 3 months, 4 months, 6 months or even longer.

I’m sure you are aware that the SIDS guideline is for 6 months of room sharing. However there is a lot of evidence to suggest that room temperature, bedding, sleeping a baby on their back, a smoke free zone and separate sleeping space (not co-sleeping) are the major factors that influence SIDS.

I can certainly understand you needing your own space and in my experience once baby is in their own room they sleep much better with fewer night waking, and so does mum as well. Your mood when caring for your baby all of the next day is very important too.  If you have a monitor, then when you move your baby use that for a short time before turning it off (or down) so you are not hearing every snort, wriggle, grunt etc that your baby makes all night. You will by now know exactly how noisy sleeping babies are!

There are however lots of different opinions in regards to this question!  If you are a new parent by now you will have realized that everything parenting seems to bring a battery of opinions whether they are wanted or not. Do exactly what you want to do when it comes to room sharing with your baby.  And above all do not feel guilty for not wanting to keep sharing a room with your baby. I’m not a big fan of any parenting advice, opinions or experts that make parents feel guilty.  Parents usually do way too much of that to themselves and certainly don’t need others to add to it. If you are ready and need more personal space and a better sleep, then move your baby.

Nicole Pierotti

Originally Published: March 7, 2014

Last Edited: September 16, 2022